


This Cry of Love

by Fangirlingmanaged



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Big Brother Harley Keener, Big Brother Peter Parker, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Post-Endgame, Protective Harley Keener, Protective Peter Parker, based on a spanish song, it's missing Tony Stark hours
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2019-10-01
Packaged: 2020-11-08 19:50:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20841071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangirlingmanaged/pseuds/Fangirlingmanaged
Summary: Tony left the best of himself in his children. Now it's up to them to hold each other together.





	This Cry of Love

**Author's Note:**

> i went to watch a Mexican rock band in concert on Saturday. They played this song and... it hit me in the feels. 
> 
> "Oye cu-cu papá se fue/ hey coo-coo clock daddy is gone  
Prende la luz/ turn on the light  
Que tengo miedo / ‘cause I’m afraid
> 
> Oye cu-cu papá se fue/ hey coo-coo clock daddy is gone  
Prende la luz / turn on the light  
Y apaga el tiempo / and turn off time"
> 
> \--El Reloj Cucu/The Coo-coo Clock by Mana

Peter first meets Morgan on the day of Tony’s funeral. He’s barely able to string three words together in front of Rhodey and Pepper, feels his heart beating out of his chest when Happy grabs him into a tight hug and cradles the back of his head, and feels his hands clenching when he looks at the Avengers. He wants to be upset, tell them that Tony had warned them _so many fucking times _that something like this would happen, but he doesn’t have the energy for it. Tony is _gone_, doing what he always did, and he won’t ruin his farewell on them.

He’d been getting better, too. Tony had been moving on. Had talked it out with Rhodey and Peter, about how much his resentment towards them, him, was burning him from the inside. And at the end of the day, even when they hadn’t listened and even when he’d been injured from their fight in Titan, Tony had done what had to be done. He’d paid the ultimate sacrifice to make sure that he righted their wrongs.

And looking at her, this little girl with the same intelligent spark in her eyes and her messy hair and Pepper’s no-nonsense glare, Peter’s heart clenches at the reality that Tony had been trying to be happy. It wasn’t easy, probably, Peter knows enough about the guilt his mentor carried to know that Tony probably beat himself every single day for failing. Peter winces internally every time he thinks about it, the last moments before he got dusted; he thinks about begging Tony not to let him go and even though he understands he’d been scared and guilty, he thinks that was probably the worst thing he could have done to his mentor. He can’t imagine the guilt Tony must have felt, after taking him out of orbit and into a fight that was much bigger than them and which none of the former Avengers had ever prepared for, only to lose him to something he couldn’t control.

Peter’s biggest regret is never having the time to apologize to Tony for putting that on him.

Now, standing behind Rhodey and Happy, Peter wishes more than anything that he could have one of the stones back. Only one. So that he can go back and take Tony’s place, maybe; maybe with his enhancements… he’s seen what the gauntlet did to Hulk, and maybe… well, Peter’s enhancements are similar, right? Maybe Peter would have been able to withstand the force of the stones. Maybe if he or Thor—

May’s hand on his arm rattles him out of his spiraling thoughts, and it’s only then that he notices his chest heaving and the way he’s biting his lip. Pepper lowers the arc reactor into the water, and Peter has an irrational moment to think _Tony needs that_ before the reality of the situation crashes back on him.

“That’s daddy’s. He needs that,” Morgan’s little voice carries over the wind rustling leaves around them. Peter feels as though he only hears it because of his enhancements, May makes no indication of having heard, but the air behind Peter shifts and he knows Cap’s just flinched. Thor’s shoulders sag and from the corner of his eye, Peter sees the Winter Soldier hang his head.

“He doesn’t need it anymore, honey,” Pepper’s words manage to be the breaking point. He hears footsteps stomping away, and when he turns his head he sees Cap marching away from them. Fury gets in his path, murmurs something too low for Peter to hear, but Cap shakes his head vehemently and rounds the house and then he’s out of sight.

Peter focuses on May’s arm around his, on the comforting smell of her perfume and the weight of her head on his shoulder. Still, he can’t stop crying.

Tony had tried for him, for Morgan, and now there was nothing of him left of him to even bury. The stones taken that too.

***

“You’re Petey,” the small voice breaks him out of his mindless staring. It’s way too late for them to be awake, and he knows it, but he can’t force himself to care. Pepper had been gracious enough to open their home to some of the people who had attended Tony’s farewell. Part of Peter thinks that she needs the noise, the boisterousness of people, to fill a space where once only Tony had been enough.

Peter knows better than anyone that nothing any of them do will ever fill the silence Tony left behind.

He wipes his eyes on the sleeve of his sweater, the one from his old spider-man costume he’s taken to wearing as comfort and tries to look put together for this little girl. This tiny person Tony had made, who’d made him happier than anything else in the world if the videos Peter has been watching are any proof, and who’d loved him just as fiercely. He’d seen it earlier, when Morgan had refused her dinner because _daddy _ hadn’t helped and _daddy’s seat _now had someone else in it and _daddy _was supposed to come back because he’d _promised _and mommy had said she was going to help bring him back. Morgan’s world had revolved around her parents, Tony had doted on her and Peter can see it in every room, every conversation with his family, on every gesture the little girl makes.

“Hey, Morgan, yeah,” Peter swallows thickly and tries to offer her a smile. “I’m Peter.”

“Daddy talks about you a lot,” she tells him, and she takes another step in his direction. She’s wearing a fingerless glove in her left hand, fashioned to look like one of the Iron Man gauntlets, and Peter’s heart twists in his chest.

“Oh yeah? What doe—did he say?” Peter turns to look at her, and after a minute’s hesitation pats the space next to him. Apparently that’s all she needs because she barrels into Peter and then takes a seat next to him.

“He said that you’re a superhero, too, like Mommy. He says you saved him,” Morgan’s voice leaves no room for argument. Her big brown eyes look at Peter not in confirmation of her father’s words but with the confidence of someone who trusts what she’s been told explicitly. Peter’s stomach clenches and the burning in his eyes has him blinking furiously up at the ceiling hoping that he won’t start crying.

Little fingers on his cheeks startle him out of his breathing exercises, and when he turns Morgan’s little face is sad. She has the same unfathomable look in her eyes that Tony sometimes got, and dear _God_ but she’s Tony’s through and through isn’t she? It’s like he’d bled everything he wants into this little girl who loved him. She pulls the sleeve of her pajamas over her little hand and wipes at Peter’s tears.

“Your daddy was my hero, Morgan,” Peter tells her as sincerely as he can. He doesn’t know if he’s going to be able to be part of her life, if Pepper will decide that losing the love of her life was all she would give to them… but he hopes he’s allowed to be near her. He thinks Tony would have wanted him to watch over her. “He saved me so many times. I wish—I hope I can be like him some day.”

Her little fingers flex on his cheeks, and for the first time in the whole day they’ve spent near each other, her eyes get glassy. Peter feels his hands shaking and he can’t seem to think of what to do when the tears start. She doesn’t cry the way he imagines little kids should, but rather the same way he does. Her little shoulders shake and the tears just keep coming and coming.

“I want my daddy,” she whispers, fingers tight on Peter’s face.

“I know, Morgan,” Peter says just as quietly. He hesitates for a second, but then he doesn’t know who needs it more, and he ends up wrapping his arms around her. She buries her face in his shoulder, and her hair tickles his nose, but he just grips her tightly to his chest. Her arms wound around her neck and she snuffles at him. “I’m gonna watch over you, okay? I’m not going anywhere. I swear to you,” he looks up at the sky at that one.

He hopes that wherever Tony is that he knows that Peter will return the favor. He loved Tony enough to give him that much.

***

Putting Morgan to bed was harder than peter would have thought. Even though he’s never really been around children her age, he knows that it’s way too late for her to be up. Part of him thinks that Tony is to blame for this little habit of hers, but even that makes the sadness in his chest get a little heavier. He wishes he had more stories to tell her, more ways for her to remember the greatest man Peter’s ever known, but he refuses to think about it. He won’t let her forget, not if he’s allowed to be around her.

The Iron Man helmet on her bedside table catches his attention, but he doesn’t mention it. instead, he makes sure that she’s all tucked in and that she has her stuffed DUM-e with her. When he goes to pull away, her little arms tighten around his neck. She’s crying again, and Peter’s heart breaks at the sight.

“It’s okay, Mor, I’m right here,” he says softly as he pushes her hair away from her face. She stares at him, sad brown eyes brimming with tears, and Peter’s heart swells near to bursting. He feels so helpless; there is nothing he can say or do that will make this better for her.

“Scary,” she says, arms tight around her stuffy.

“The dark?” Peter whispers back, holding her hand. She nods and her eyes go to the helmet sitting on her nightstand. “what can I do?”

“Daddy makes it better,” she whispers. Peter’s throat constricts and he can’t get the words out. How is he—of course Tony made things better. Tony _always _made things better, but how is he supposed to tell this little girl that her daddy can’t come help her. Her daddy won’t make the darkness go away. He won’t be able to soothe her anymore.

“Morgan, I—he can’t—I’m sorry,” he says softly and he’s not proud of the way his voice breaks.

“She means the helmet,” another voice chimes in from the doorway. Peter turns to look at the kid that he met earlier. He’d introduced himself as Harley, and even though their conversation had been stilted and awkward at the beginning, they’d eventually managed to find some common ground. “He—Tony left something for her there.”

“oh, I—how do I—” suddenly Peter feels big and clumsy sitting next to Morgan. Harley sighs from the doorway and grabs the helmet. He sits down on the floor next to Morgan, head tilted back, and fusses with something inside it. Peter makes to get off the bed; obviously Harley has it figured out, but Morgan wraps her fingers around his hand.

“You gotta stay and listen, Petey,” she tugs insistently until he’s back down next to Harley; arm extended awkwardly to hold her hand.

“Yeah, okay,” he says and closes his eyes. Whatever it is, whatever is coming, he knows it’s going to hurt. He hasn’t heard the last message Tony left him, Pepper had told him it was in the server whenever he was ready, but he doesn’t know if he ever will be. He can’t think of Tony and—thinking he’s gone is impossible at the moment. There’s a childish part of his brain that keeps saying that _it’s Tony_. How could someone so larger than life, so fucking protective and good and _trying_—how is it fair that he’s gone?

_All right, kiddo, let’s both pretend it’s not some ungodly hour and you’re still away tinkering with one of my very important new projects. At least when Mommy asks us that’s what I’ll say. Boy, do I got a story for you tonight. It’s about this kid I met in Queens about seven years ago; he’s—he’s one of the best people I’ve ever met. His name’s Petey, well Peter Parker really, but I’ve been calling him Petey for a while now. Don’t tell him I said that when I get him back, okay? Because I will, Morguna, I’ll get our little spider back. Anyways, kind of like your trouble making bad influence Harley, Petey saved my life. You’ll see—_

_ ***_

The recording goes on for a while, but Morgan goes to sleep fairly fast. She whimpers in her sleep occasionally, but both Peter and Harley are there to sooth her. She calls out for Tony often, and when Pepper walks in and finds them both holding on to her daughter, she walks out just as quietly. God knows how Tony did it, but he always managed to get the best kids. She stands there for a moment, and with her eyes closed, she can almost imagine that Tony’s dream had actually come true. For a moment. She stands there, listens to her husband’s voice telling his children how much he loves them, and for a moment it feels like everything is okay.

Then the moment passes, and the ache in her heart returns, but not as strongly. She has Morgan after all, and everything in her that is Tony but better. And she has Tony’s boys, who didn’t even need twenty-four hours to fall in love with her little girl. She moves to pull Morgan’s blanket a little higher up, smooths both of the boy’s hair and presses a kiss to the Iron Man helmet.

“You did good, Tony,” she whispers brokenly, and then closes the door behind her.


End file.
